Shely here (: I apologize for not writing in so long. Truth is I’ve been going through a sort of difficult, interesting season since I came back from Kansas City. Kansas City was AWESOME by the way. The Lord definitely spoke some incredible things into my life and broke off all sorts of lies I had been believing about my body and my image and even Him- such as His character and the type of God I had believed I was worshipping. He’s so good by the way! and he wants us to have good things, and a life more abundant btw – I just thought I’d add that in there.
Fast forward to now, ever since school started I had been getting my butt kicked. Many of the things I told myself was going to change once the semester started, ended within a week of the semester starting. Even though many of my plans had fallen though, I’ve learned (and am still learning) how to be fluid in many cases. I’m learning that seasons change and they’re all different and that God is not a type A personality type of person. He goes from A to B to Z to V to M to C back to B- as Banning Liebscher often says. I’m also learning that THAT’S OKAY because if I truly trust Him to be my life partner, I’ll trust him no matter what season I’m in and no matter what direction I’m going in. Paul says, somewhere in one of the books (I could look it up, but I’m not.) that He’s learned to be content in all seasons and that he’s learned to live with a lot and he’s learned what it’s like to live with a little. I’ve constantly been pondering on that, asking myself “what is it, that could possibly cause paul to be content in all season?” and it’s trusting God. When you trust him and truly trust him, you can easily live in a mansion or in a hut and your faith not be shaken.
That was a side note (: what I really wanna share with you all is through this tough season of things not going to way I had them planned. I felt his comfort. James 1:2 says “Consider it pure joy brothers, whenever you face trials of MANY KINDS for you know that the testing of your faith develops perseverance and perseverance has to finish its work so that you may be mature and complete not lacking anything.” I was reading in John 15 the other day when Jesus says “I am the vine and you are the branches… Who ever does not bear fruit gets cut off and thrown into the fire but whoever DOES bear fruit he prunes, so that you will be even more fruitful.” the greek word for prunes is kathairó meaning to cleanse or purify. If God was to just let us stay where we are once we bear fruit then that fruit bearing would never increase. So we consider it pure joy because we know we’re being perfected. Facing trials doesn’t have to be something huge and profound that’s happened to your life and now everything is in pieces, no it’s anything that challenges the position of your heart, because that challenge will cause your heart to change but remember there’s light at the end of the tunnel. After having a really hard month. This weekend was probably the hardest. I tried running from emotions that I didn’t want to deal with but facing them caused me to accept I was believing a lie about God because the way I felt contradicted how I should be feeling if faith was found in me on that issue, makes sense? So Sunday morning I went to church after not being there for a while (which I don’t encourage doing, though God was with me in it and he spoke to be about some things concerning that). At church He spoke over me revelation upon revelation and promise about my life. The scripture Matthew 24:13 comes to mind that says: “But those who endure to the end will be saved.” (saved in the greek meaning safety, preserved and rescued)
I could go on about this for days, but I want to encourage you guys who are going through things. I have no idea what you’re dealing with, but I know that the bible says “blessed are those who mourn for they will be comforted” and when I think of that I go beyond that, that you can’t be blessed with the great things of God unless you face hardship, we see this pattern all throughout the bible, and the greater the hardship – the darker the tunnel the greater the light at the end. Trials and tribulation is definitely a personal thing. Someone can go through the exact same thing as you but it’s still not the same as you experiencing it and learning from being in the fire yourself. Each diamond is different, they’re all thrown into the fire in the same way but when they come out of the fire their make is different and unique on the inside.
While you’re in the fire just remember God is soooooo good! He’s gentle and humble and meek and kind in nature and he loves you more than you love you. He promises to never leave us or forsake us. Even if you don’t hear his voice right now or “feel” his presence right now he’s still with you, watching after you, walking with you in this difficult time. Stay strong and endure ’til the end because “we are not of those who shrink back and are destroyed but of those who believe and are saved.” and remember that “if God is with you who can be against you?” You’re his prized possession.
Hey guys!!! I know I haven’t written in a while. I’ve been real busy with school but an update will be coming soon (: as most of you know I’m a dancer, going to school for it, called to it, and I love it. So here’s some choreography from one of my dance role models, Enjoy!
Abba is looking for a generation to live life and ministry out of the place of adoption. A rebirth into his family, a generation who will rest in Him as the perfect Father. A Father to the Fatherless, as scripture says. All throughout the time I was in Kansas City and even now the Father has been authenticating my adoption papers. Although they’ve never been proven false, I was still living like they were. I randomly decided to listen to Jonathan David Helser’s podcast and I believe the Father spoke such a distinct word to me through him about the spirit of adoption and what my identity in Him really is and what it really means. I hope you guys like.
This week I came to Kansas City for the Onething 2013 Conference at IHOP-KC. As some of you know I visited back in July for the WiLDER Institute. One of the most life changing experiences I’ve ever had. While I was in Vegas before I left, I felt very dry. As if I was in one of those ‘God where are you?’ seasons. I remember sitting on my bedroom floor as I was packing thinking “God when is this going to stop? I am tired of getting excited for the next big conference or trip or event or visiting of a church in order to get a greater revelation of you, when is this going to end?” Once I got to Kansas City and the conference started, worship and the message just felt very dry to me and this went on for about a day and a half. It wasn’t that there was something wrong with the conference or even the church, as most of you know IHOP-KC is very spirit filled, but it was me.
The next day my friend and I went to the prayer room. Time that was much needed for me. While there I felt the Lord say to me “it’s not a conference, not an event, not a church, not friends, not a movement that will fill you up and bring life to you, it’s only me, I’m all there is” and in that moment my heart was like wow God, I get it. I feel like we hear that all of the time. Jesus is all there is, but in our hearts we still put movements and churches and conferences before Him. The same Jesus we experience at conferences we can experience in our bedrooms with a bible. Earlier this semester I found myself straying from my word. I got to the point where I had the mindset “I don’t really have to read, I’ll like listen to a message or pray in tongues or turn on the prayer room and I’ll be fine” and let me tell you, that is the most dangerous mindset to have! In that moment when your heart shifts as such you set yourself up for deception and you give the enemy a foothold. I’m thinking in my heart that Jesus is at the conference or in these specific places and I have to go there to find him, but it’s not true! He’s here with me right now and forevermore. I can encounter Him and pursue him just by spending time with him and I get more of him in my life by spending time with him as each day passes.
I was talking earlier this week with some friends about “the movement” and not any specific ones but how temporary it is and how Jesus is not a movement but a man. I refuse to become one of those Christians who are sucked into the hype and excitement of a worship band or a movement or a specific church. Only the ones who know Jesus will endure until the end, and I want to endure until the end. It all reminds me of what Jesus says in Matthew 24:35 “Heaven and earth will pass away but my words will never pass away.” and when Jesus says that he’s referring to heaven and earth and everything in it, but Jesus Christ will remain forever, He is the Word (John 1:1). This trip has opened my eyes and made me so thankful. I was not expecting what Jesus has been teaching me about himself but it’s something that is significant and much needed. I’m realizing how much I LOVE Jesus. How much He makes my heart come alive. I could dance, I could go to an amazing church and do amazing things, I could go to a foreign country on a mission trip and risk my life, I could be the smartest, prettiest, richest woman living on the earth today, but apart from God at the end of my life, I will still feel empty and plain inside because only he could bring my heart to life. For most of my time at this conference, I just found myself thanking God over and over again that I know him and he knows me. Of course there is so much more knowing to be done on my part but I still know him and after this conference when I go home, I can open my bible and get to know him even more. I can spend personal time with him. I was thanking him that he’s living, that he’s with me and that he’ll never leave me or forsake me and thanking him that I’m his and He’s mine. <3
This week Father God has been showing me how I haven’t really been enjoying him. I can tell you that so far, two days of really moving forward and positioning my heart in a place to let him love me, has caused me to feel like a whole new creation. I assume it can only go up from here. I don’t really know what’s going to happen next, but I can tell you he’s with me right now, smiling over me (: and I’m loving it.
So I encourage you to examine your heart, how are you treating God? Are you enjoying him? When you’re sitting around not doing anything, do you acknowledge his presence, day in and day out? Do you allow him to run errands with you and study for finals with you? Because I can guarantee, a perfect Father would delight in doing the smallest, simplest of things with you, as long as he’s with you.
“I am the true vine, and My Father is the vinedresser. 2 Every branch in Me that does not bear fruit He takes away; and every branch that bears fruit He prunes, that it may bear more fruit. 3 You are already clean because of the word which I have spoken to you. 4 Abide in Me, and I in you. As the branch cannot bear fruit of itself, unless it abides in the vine, neither can you, unless you abide in Me. 5 “I am the vine, you are the branches. He who abides in Me, and I in him, bears much fruit; for without Me you can do nothing. 6 If anyone does not abide in Me, he is cast out as a branch and is withered; and they gather them and throw them into the fire, and they are burned. 7 If you abide in Me, and My words abide in you, you will ask what you desire, and it shall be done for you. 8 By this My Father is glorified, that you bear much fruit; so you will be My disciples. 9 “As the Father loved Me, I also have loved you; abide in My love.”
“It’s not the preceding word but the proceeding word that’s life to you, it’s not what God said but what he’s saying, what God said tells you how he thinks and what God is saying tells you what God is thinking” -Kris Vallotton